This month I’m going cliche and leaning into 20s tropes–aided by the fact that I mainlined Peaky Blinders over the Christmas break and have wanted to do nothing but smoky eyeshadow ever since. It’s such a grungy yet stylish show! Given my fairly basic wardrobe for the month, injecting drama via makeup feels like the right course of action.
I’m definitely not looking to whiskey swilling thugs for health inspiration though; it’s all salads and self-denial in other arenas!
Beloveds, 2020 is upon us! And my god, we’re only three days in. I’ve honestly been trying to muster up some positivity for the new year, as I normally enjoy fresh slates and clean starts, but I’m struggling. 2019 was hard on a personal level and scary on a macro one, and 2020 is…ah…seeming to start as it means to go on.
However, on a long and delightful call with X the other day we discussed the wonderful motivating power of SPITE. So join me, poppets, in declaring at the outset, that we are not going to give in to despair or undue cynicism–for no other reason than that our collective antagonists are hoping for just that. Get hydrated, caffeine up, register to vote, pick a small handful of causes that you care about deeply to devote your energies to, decide whose good opinion and love is actually important to you and prioritize your life according, and hug a dog. We’re going to get through this year and we’re going to do it with aplomb.
Here is a nice batch of weekend reading to look back fondly on the good, catch up on some things you may have missed, and ground yourself for what we’re likely going to deal with in 2020.
I bet you didn’t know you needed a deep dive into the world of lingerie, but you do.
I’m glad that the news media seems final able to confront some of their failings, particularly the areas that fall in talking head and “opini-tainment” as Jon Stewart once called it. I also think that for it to have taken this long denotes something more disappointing if not sinister.
At this point, reporting that does not do the connecting work of white nationalism and other political views is doing an active disservice to us. I’m grateful to see this changing.
I’m also grateful to see the discourse on climate change improving, but it’s horrifically late.
This is a fantastic round up of culture “moments” of the past year, and a good list of things to try and catch up on if you’ve thus far missed out.
Behold a goddamned headline!
People who are anti-immigration in my country can’t do math.
I could read a whole book on how “fan culture” has taken over everything from politics to pop culture, and what this means for us as a society. I spend an inordinate time thinking about it. In the meanwhile, this article is a great starting point.
Romance is a genre I used to morally eschew, then read in shameful secret, and now revel in openly. There is some seriously good writing to be found in its pages, too often dismissed because the target audience is women and the main topic is feelings. That’s a rant for another day…what you need to know is that some major DRAMA went down in the Romance world this week. I watched it unfold in real time on Twitter, but for those who need a primer, Lois Beckett from The Guardian is here to help!
Relatedly to all of the above mess, let’s all diversify our reading this year, shall we?
Oh. So that’s why witnesses are being blocked. Shock, surprise.
Oh. So that’s why the secrecy. More shock, surprise.
We had a fascinating debate in my office about this! It spiraled into the differences between religious and “philosophical” belief systems, and how we chose to allocate protections.
Still developing as I finish up this post but…this feels horribly huge. The consequences are already starting. Mar-al-ago guests and Russian diplomats knew about the attack before the appropriate members of congress did. I remember this all too well from 20 years ago. The performative hawkishness and patriotism, the propaganda to circle the wagons around the government, the othering of whole nations and cultures with a long tail of hideous racism that we are still dealing with. 20 years later, thousands of Americans and allies dead, hundreds of thousands of civilians dead, no clear gains, no increased stability, recent revelations that there was no fucking plan in the first place…NO. NOT AGAIN. Not to appease ideologues, not to distract from domestic scrutiny, not for anything.
Last summer I did my first capsule wardrobe project in preparation for our apartment move. I figured the new year and a refreshed emphasis on intentions and frugality was as good a time as any to do its cold weather equivalent.
I’m already two weeks in (admittedly lounging about for the Christmas holidays made this a fairly easy project to start) and already finding similar benefits as to last time. Having done several wardrobe culls this past year, I feel that my closet is more sharply edited than it was prior to our move and most of what I own is a much better reflection of what I like and actually wear.
I pulled 16 items from my closet (leaving four “wildcard” slots that I can fill in later if I find an unfilled need) and am seeing if I can make two months worth of outfits using just them and accessories. Without really intending it, I noticed when typing this up that many of these items are considered “basics” in and of themselves–lots of neutrals, simple silhouettes, and a couple of prints just to shake things up.
Chunky black and camel sweater (& Other Stories)
Black turtleneck (J. Crew)
Gray turtleneck sweater (Uniqlo)
Camel crew sweater (Uniqlo)
Striped pullover top (Everlane)
Printed silk shirt (Joy)
White shirt (Everlane)
Blue jeans (Everlane)
Black jeans (J. Crew)
Leather trousers (vintage/thrifted)
Leather skirt (?)
Black trousers (Gap)
Cashmere knit dress, navy (The White Company, thrifted)
Striped knit dress (J. Crew)
Leopard print dress (& Other Stories)
Black dress (M.M. LaFleur)
Emotional spending has long been my bug bear (I’ve already had to sit on my hands a few times in the last few months to avoid temptation) but short self challenges like capsule wardrobes or spending challenges that you track can be great ways to help check impulses. My very old-school approach to tracking progress is to literally tick off a day in a notebook–a dinky but useful way to view my project history in a single place.
And do you know what, it helps! While tempted, I’ve not given in to a single post-Christmas sale and the only money we’ve moved is to pay down another chunk of credit card. By the time this project is done, we should be able to pay off another credit card (our third) in full and then turning our attention to our final, largest card. As I’ve written, that’s one of my big money goals for this year. For the moment, that’s what my closet represents and no temptation is stronger than that.
Have you ever done a capsule wardrobe project, or something similar? What was your motivation? Did it change your behaviors or habits in any way?
Truth telling time, I struggled in trying to visualize this year’s theme and I’ve been wrestling with how to frame it for more than a month. A lot of my previous yearly themes have been about achievement and “leveling up,” but in trying to think about what I wanted to accomplish in 2020, what I really want to do in the coming year is to come back down to earth and ground myself.
I 100% attribute this to recent conversations with friends (and a doctor) about what has actually happened in my life over the several years: a faith collapse, career changes, international immigration, health issues…every single year in recent memory has had some kind of dramatic and deeply changing set of events in it. Some of these have been very empowering and good, some have been the most humbling and painful experiences of my life.
It’s a strange thing, and not very au courant to admit, but achievement isn’t as high on my list this year as much as centering on what I already know is good for me. My aspirations are…oddly basic.
I wrote a bit about this in my wrap up post, but I want to build on the financial progress of last year. I’ve spent years breaking bad money habits and building better ones, and this is the year I plan to see them (literal) pay off. I’ve given myself some measurable goals around savings and shopping, to recap:
And the way I’m going to achieve a lot of the above is by “going back to basics.” I’m going to prioritize cooking food rather than buying it (something that I did way too much of this year and which adds up scarily quickly). I’m going to continue my “no buy/low buy” challenges for personal shopping and blog transparently about what I do purchase this year to hold myself accountable.
Ultimately, the most basic thing of all, I want to begin saving up to purchase property. I’m officially moving into my “mid 30s” this year and I’m tired of having no net worth. While I have no illusions that we can save enough for any kind of deposit or down payment in a single year, I do know that having a “big goal” to work towards helps me maintain a vision and make lots of smaller, everyday choices that add up. Part of my transparency will include broad updates about our savings milestones and debt repayment, with this big ambition in mind. By the end of 2020, I want to be able to visualize and work towards a definite path towards property ownership.
This year I’m going to focus much more on cultivating my existing relationships, as well as trying to build new ones. A dark side of depression and anxiety is how self-centered and self-focused it makes you–you often are so trapped in your own head and experience that you lose the ability to see outside yourself. It’s a trait I’ve observed in loved ones who have struggled with mental health challenges and unfortunately, it’s something I’ve noticed in myself over the last couple of years. God bless my friends who have not just tolerated this extended period of selfishness, but actively helped me navigate it and are helping me out of it through good counsel and sheer love. In 2020 I plan on spending time and money to connect with friends and loved ones better. In addition to being a better friend to those I already have, I want to try and cultivate some new friendships. I don’t really have a “tribe” here in the UK, not even after years of living here, and that’s something I need to change.
I’ve also noted how my partnership has been affected by mutual career ambitions and time commitments. While this has often resulted in some really spectacular support in both directions, 2019 was a rough year for us both work-wise and it led to a lot of disconnection. It’s been good to talk this through as part of our year end wrap up, and identify the ways we want to challenge our defaults in 2020, including travel and work/life changes.
It’s a myth that good relationships of all stripes don’t take effort – the best ones usually are a result of the right kind of effort: love, empathy, support, and prioritization. And there is nothing more important in my life than the friends and loved ones who make it worth living. My behavior and choices this year are going to actively reflect that.
Finally, and the most “basic” and shallow goal of all, I want to lose weight. I’m not about to frame this as a “health” challenge or anything else that’s particularly woke…it’s purely for vanity and self-esteem. I’ve struggled with my weight for a long time and, with the benefit of therapy, anti anxiety drugs, and hindsight, I can see how many other issues related to money and health have gotten tied up in body issues. FOR YEARS. It’s cliche and annoying…but it’s my reality.
2020 seems like it may be a more low-key year, but that may not be a bad thing.
As part of my “no buy/low buy” challenges I’ve been eschewing the buying of makeup for several months with two exceptions: the launch of the Victoria Beckham Beauty brand, and the Glossier pop up shop in London. The first was something I’ve been looking forward to for years and the second was a chance to try new products in person before making a call as to whether to purchase them or not. Both of these safely behind me, my wallet has been on lockdown and I’ve been focused on using up the plethora of products I already own.
You know where this is going…the last empties post of the year! Part I, Part II, and Part III here for your prurient pleasure.
Here’s everything I used up in the last few months!
Ignore the sloppy addition of the skincare item (Paula’s Choice Vitamin C, which is excellent), it’s due to idiocy on my part. I used up several makeup items in the last few months, which is always interesting and instructive to report. There is little to surprise here in terms of brands. I used up a bottle of Glossier Skin Perfector (which isn’t really worth the money unless you already have magnificent skin), another tube of Boy Brow (which is very much worth the coin) and their clear gloss (which is perfectly acceptable). I used up an entire compact of Charlotte Tilbury powder and a concealer, both of which are very good products, but I am trying to replace at lower price points…thus far without success. The powder is the very best I have yet tried and as soon as my current, cheaper option is done for, I’ll probably repurchase it. The lipstick is 1975 Red, which was a very lovely birthday present from former coworkers which I used to the last swipe. It’s limited edition, but the brand is pretty good when it comes to its lipsticks, so I’d never call even LE items bad for money. I also used up a lip gloss from Bite Beauty, and another tube of my favorite cheap mascara (which I absolutely picked up a handful of in the States when I was there for my brother’s wedding this summer). Finally, I polished off a Maybellline primer which was very nice, but which I haven’t been able to find again since finishing and so have replaced with a slightly more expensive option.
Oh look, my boring shower reliables.
A lot of additional reliable products which longtime readers will recognize, including the Thank You Farmer SPF and No 7 Gel Cleanser. I am trying to find a replacement for my Glossier moisturizer that costs less, and have been having luck with the Avene line thus far. Garnier is a good alternative to the Bioderma micellar water, and more easily found than the latter (even though it has now found its way to the UK through commonplace pharmacies). The Ordinary also continues to make really affordable and effective serums which I love and use regularly.
Et voila! The last empties report of the year is finished.
Per my 101/1001 goals, I’m going to attempt to use up $1,000 worth of items and blog about it in 2020–primarily because no one should own that much stuff of a perishable product in the first place and I want to significantly reduce my overall number of products, and second to get my literal money’s worth. I’m not proud of the fact that I own as much stuff as I do, and I’m curious how much I can use up in a year if I don’t purchase anything new to divert my attention. It’s a niche goal, admittedly, but in keeping with my aim of getting “Back to Basics.”
The last month of the year draws to a close, ducklings, and as always, I have a short list of the things that made the bleak midwinter a bit less bleak.
As always, please share your favorite things from the month in the comments!
What a joy this film was! It’s that rare thing that manages to hit all the tropes of its genre while still being fresh and original. Every single actor and respective character is perfectly formed, and the ensemble together is fantastic. You can tell that everyone working on this project just had so much fun doing it–who knew Daniel Craig could do comedy noir this well?! Much has been written on the costuming (if there was an Oscar for knitwear….) but the entire design of the movie is a visual feast from the sets to the cinematography. I can’t remember enjoying a movie as much in a long time. If you love murder mysteries of any stripe, and appreciate a good love letter to the genre istelf, it is not to be missed.
Much as I love the brand, I looked at this product askance when it first dropped. A sheer, oil/serum hybrid designed to make you look shiny… Surely only twenty year olds with already perfect skin could use such a thing, right? Well, shut my mouth. I tried it at Glossier’s London pop up in Covent Garden and was shocked at how much I liked the look and feel of it on my skin! It isn’t classified as makeup and provides no coverage beyond a touch of blurring luminosity, but when combined with concealer produces a lovely “fresh face.” I’ve used it almost every day since purchase.
We went on a winter break pop culture binge and one of the areas Jeff is undertaking to enlighten me is the world of anime. He recommended this cult classic series and I mainlined it! It’s a very difficult series to describe as it’s a mashup of science fiction, film noir, and western genres and tropes but the final blend is a standalone story that is wholly unique. I’m very new to this stuff, but if anyone can recommend other anime series they think I’d like based on this, please send them my way. Jeff’s already got a couple lined up, but a girl can’t ever have too many!
We finally bought these after talking about it for years…and what a great decision it was! We first experienced these at Jeff’s parents’ house and it was a gamechanging experience for winter. It wasn’t expensive in the slightest, we just grabbed some brushed cotton version from John Lewis on a Black Friday sale. If thus far your 2019 has been insufficiently cozy, try adjusting your bedding.
Whew, let’s talk about this one, ducklings. In what is becoming a bit of a theme for longtime readers, this is another area where I have waited too long to get help that in retrospect I clearly needed years ago. In fact, the conversation with my doctor went something along the lines of, “So the last six years have involved cross-Atlantic immigration, freelancing and toxic jobs, career changes, financial stress, religious faith collapse, and the personal strains that all the above entails. Here are all the lifestyle changes I’ve made to try and manage and many have helped, but I’ve hit a wall and here are all the things that aren’t getting better in my mental health (in fact, a few are getting worse). I think I’ve let this go on way too long and I think I need additional medical help to cope.”
Quoth my doctor, in essence, “Girl, you think?!”
I’ve only been on it for a month, but I’m feeling much more emotionally stable and in control of my own brain than I have in at least two years. LEARN FROM MY FAIL, ASK FOR HELP IF YOU FEEL YOU NEED IT.
Did I live up to my theme this year? Well, sort of…
2019 was a middling year for me. There are some distinct high points and progress, but quite a few rough patches and some of them are ongoing. While discipline was a useful framing device for many aspects of life this year, it was fundamentally inadequate in others and possibly held me back in a few areas where what I needed wasn’t discipline at all…
Quite often “discipline” became a code word for “sticking something out” when what I actually needed to do was make a change, confront an issue, or seek help. I’m still unpicking this revelation and trying to learn the difference between things I need to endure and the things I’m allowed to opt out of or switch up. While I wish I didn’t have to learn this lesson in the hard ways that I did, I’m grateful to have this insight and will be taking it into the new year with me.
This was up and down until September when a lot of mental health and adjacent health issues were well and truly confronted. The wrestling match continues, but it feels like a big missing piece to the puzzle of my health overall and I’m looking forward to hopefully continuing the necessary work in 2020 to get better. I’m still not ready to write more publicly about this yet, but things are improving.
Financial discipline continues to be an area of growth of which I’m extremely proud. It’s far from perfect but I’m ending the year nearer my goals than I was when I started. While we still have too much debt, our spending habits underwent another year of change, helped by things like moving to a cheaper home and reducing our expenses overall. This turned out to be a double good thing when things like therapy and tackling mental health came into the picture. I can afford it and add to savings at the same time, which was not the case at the start of 2019! This is a work in progress, and a lot of my 101/1001 goals have helped continue to curb my old consumerist habits. Two credit cards have been paid off this year, several personal buying challenges have been completed or are in progress, and a much more aggressive approach to savings has been implemented.
But money has been a particular stress point this year that has infected almost everything in my life, from work to relationships. In 2020 I want to achieve a number of things that I think will break the hold money has on my brain and allow me to feel in control of it, rather than the other way around.
Grooming and style were big goals for me because of a change in my work circumstances in 2018. I was put on a board in my company which made me one of the two youngest people around that particular table–a fact of which I’m both proud and constantly self conscious. Presentation matters at work and it’s an area that I still struggle with. However, 2019 was the year that I did, in fact, “tame my mane” and learned how to style my hair properly–it turns out that hairstyling products are the key. WHOMEVER COULD HAVE GUESSED. And, as I have mentioned before, my closet is probably the best it’s ever been due to consistent evaluation and decluttering. I’ve donated or sold a decent minority of stuff this year, and what remains is a much more curated batch of clothing that better reflects my life and style.
Ditto for my bathroom shelves. Abject beauty lover that I am, this year I used up or gifted an absolute shedload of products in the aim of generally downsizing my life. All of my makeup now lives in two acrylic containers, and I am going to try and only repurchase items that I use up fully in 2020 without purchasing anything new at all. Wish me luck again.
Adulthood is hard, my ducklings. Every year in recent memory has had challenges and headwinds (see again, my conversation with my doctor…), but it has also had victories and growth and goodness. This year was no different. Much went wrong, much went right. I think I can safely say that 2019 was the year that either enabled or forced me to make some big changes that were long overdue and while the growth has been painful in places, my chief regrets have to do with waiting as long as I did to make them in the first place. Of all the lessons I’m taking from this year, a rejection of apathy is the biggest one.
Huh. Which, come to think of it, may be the most basic tenet of discipline there is…
It’s Christmas week, kittens! We were woefully unprepared for the holidays this year and much of our preparations have been of the last minute variety. I snagged the last slot available for Tesco grocery delivery, the last tickets for our local theatre’s “The Rise of Skywalker” (didn’t like it at all, I’m sorry to say), and the second to last delivery option for our Christmas tree. We got my sister’s present in the mail to Japan on the last possible day. We are one missed time slot away from disaster, here!
However, this year we are attempting some holiday baking which is not something we’ve really done in our time in London. Every year that goes by and we “settle” we seem to have a more functional kitchen, so we are leaning into that this season. That being said I burned the last thing I put in the oven to charcoal crisps so…watch this space.
Other than that, we are indulging in food and drink this week and doing precious little else. There are a few more posts coming your way before the end of the year, but in the meantime, I hope your Christmas preparations are going better than mine–if you celebrate–and that you are enjoying the winter season with friends and family.
We’re all going to have to move.
“I’ve made a complete break mentally with the world I used to live in.”
Some leading conservative commentators, campaign veterans and media personalities have launched a PAC aimed at defeating President Trump in 2020…or more specifically Trumpism. Their argument, with which I agree, is that Trump does not represent the ideological conservatism that they revere and wish to restore. However, the rise of Trumpism has made me question how much of this ideology was genuine in the first place, and how much of it was simply a wish for ingroups to maintain their own power (financial, racial, perceived control over life circumstances, and so on). Trumpism s
It’s always a joyous week when Anne Thériault drops her latest in the Queens of Infamy series!
Add this to the list of films I want to see. Preferably with Hannah whilst sipping wine.
This piece is over a year old but it’s new to me and how pleasing it is!
I am glad we are asking the question seriously, “What are we going to do with/for/about men?” and making art that tackles that topic. Men may need to puzzle this out on their own, and there’s a question of what role women should take in this debate. (Contrapoints, a prominent left-wing YouTuber, recently made a video arguing this point of view as well–content warning re drug references, sex and sexuality frank talk, and some pretty bold/provocative visuals. I love her and her hyperbolic and performative aesthetic, but she’s definitely not going to be all my reader’s cup of tea!)
Longtime readers know how much I love murder mysteries–a “cozy” murder read or show is quite probably my favorite way to relax. …I’m not saying I’m healthy, I’m saying I’m self aware. And one of the purely aesthetic aspects my film and TV murder favorites all share is that they are stylish as hell. (And in Small Dog Nation, we stan Madeline Khan forever!)
Well, it’s happening.
In religion news this week, this editorial is blistering and it’s still sobering to think of how little effect it will have on the intended community. (ETA, The National Review got in on the act. I predict the same results.)
The Good Place is on hiatus until January, but here is a lovely piece on it and its approach to hopeful humanism and the limits of philosophy. I truly believe TGP is an active force for good in the world.
Woof. This is something I’m thinking a lot about recently, both in and out of therapy.
It’s been a rough week of news, kittens. Between the British election (which went the way I thought it would but much more overwhelmingly than I anticipated) and the impeachment news in the US, I’m feeling pretty grim overall. Taking a step back, the largest takeaway I continue to have is that all of the old ways of categorizing people and voters seem fundamentally overturned. Old party lines have been redrawn along very different agendas and it’s foolish for anyone, of any political persuasion, to rely on traditional default allies. MAGA and Brexit have subsumed any other conversation or loyalty. Normally these flips take at least a generation, now it’s happening in single term limits. Setting aside my personal biases, it’s academically fascinating. I still think the direction of travel is badly dangerous.
Here’s a week of reading to help you muddle through. It’s entirely election-free, for your mental health and mine.
Yes, I saw the story about the banana. I cackled.
An interesting news story out of Finland! While I would obviously like to see more female leadership overall, I’m also interested in younger leadership in politics. In the same way that we have actively promoted other forms of diversity, I think we need badly to add more elected representatives in the age ranges of the electorates they represent…ie, I’d like more millennials representing me because I’d trust them to have a more personal and correct view of my experience and priorities as a citizen.
What a grim, grim piece of reporting–thanks to aggressively pursuing FOIA requests for years.
Climate change, like the gun debate, often serves as shorthanded for wider culture wars in American society. It’s tribalistic and unhelpful when facing planetary crisis, so I was pleased to read this piece on how the tide may be changing with a key demographic. It’s self-evident to me that the agriculture industries could turn into one of our biggest assets in dramatically reworking our ways of living around necessary change.
Why yes, I would like a decade perspective of our Queen and Goddess Beyonce.
OH DUCKLINGS, I will have much to say on the glory of the knitwear of Knives Out later, but in the meantime this article will suffice more generally.
Ugh. With the benefit of hindsight, I’m very convinced that being on hormonal birth control for a decade contributed significantly to my health challenges (especially regarding mental health and anxiety). Let me be clear, I am NOT a person who dismisses hormonal treatments and scientific medicine and people who try and peddle pseudoscience around health enrage me. But I wish I had been much more proactive about seeking medical guidance on what was the best option for me long before I finally did so. Don’t make my mistake, peeps. If you’re not feeling right, physically or mentally, ask for help!
This should have been a much bigger news story, but of course it landed among all NAFTA 2.0 and impeachment news and so got a bit lost in the shuffle.
Good for her! Though I’m reminded that she herself once said something to the effect that the grownups would laud her and probably not do anything to fix the problem…
And all shall bow before him!
This piece thoughtfully lays out the debate I’ve been having with myself for most of my adult life, and which I believe to be the simmering argument beneath a lot of American politics. What do we need to adapt or tweak, and what do we need to tear down and rebuild outright?
“Global inequality is now more about disparities in opportunity than disparities in income.”
Yes, give me a longform read on this meme!
Jia Tolentino, who you may remember from my recent favorites posts if you weren’t already familiar with her writing, has dropped her latest for The New Yorker on how our current media and online life is leading to a fairly comment “lewk,” as the children say. What this reveals about is is…a bit scary.
Hey kids, I’m still taking things easy, but I felt bad for not sharing a few of the things that have made the last couple of months a bit easier to manage. I’ve done a double batch for two months of failed updates to make up for my continuing, shameful neglect of you. As always, it’s a grab bag of pop culture, beauty, randomness, and silliness and I want to hear about your own bundles of random goodness too. Share your seasonal favorites with me in the comments, I need all the good things I can get.
I needed to replace used up foundations this year and hoped to try and find an alternative to my beloved (and expensive) Armani Luminous Silk Foundation at a lower price point. I did this…barely…and discovered a fab new addition to the makeup lineup that isn’t getting quite as much attention as I think it should. This newish foundation is very liquid-y, less viscose than most I’ve tried and yet with very good coverage. Most importantly, it’s one of the best color matches I’ve found for my skin–and when you find that, kittens, you cough up the money and don’t ask too many questions! If you like lighter feeling formulas that can be built up or sheered out based on your preference, I think this is a great contender and can recommend it!
It’s cold and dark and my lips are chapped. Huzzah for winter! For reasons yet unknown to science, every other lip balm I had to hand suddenly revolted on me and I endured several weeks of what are either the worst chapping I’ve ever had, or some kind of allergic reaction. It took a long time to calm down and left me paranoid about putting anything on the skin around my mouth that didn’t come highly recommended and vetted. Alas for me, this little pot (which is hideously expensive) turned out to be the only thing that didn’t make a flaky and painful situation worse and I’ve been slathering it on since the weather changed. I’m not sure I can recommend it in good conscience given the price, but if you have the money and the need to spend it on something a bit more upscale than Blistex, it’s a very soothing formula. And yes, I’m probably going to repurchase it when I finish the pot…
I only bought three things to “update my wardrobe” for winter this year: one was the beautiful camel coat I actually swapped for, the others were two Chanel nail polishes–the first I’d ever bought from the brand. I’d actually performed a clear out of the small bag that I keep my nail products in as most of them were years old and separated and decided to replace them all with just two shades: an all-purpose, deep red and a near-black, both part of Chanel’s excellent holiday collection. The red is especially beautiful, a brown-y, red-y color that, true to its name, looks expensive and good with everything. It also looks good on every skintone I have seen it used or swatched on! It was a simple way to streamline my beauty cabinet yet further, reduce the waste and wasted space used on expired items, and treat myself for a new season without breaking the bank.
On to books, one fiction and nonfiction. Starting with the latter, this essay collection from Jian Tolentino–a writer with The New Yorker who writes about modern life and experience from a decidedly female and millennial perspective–was a page turner. I admire Tolentino’s writing a great deal, and found her exploration of the strangeness and complexity of life thoughtful and sharp. She seems fairly unflinching in her examinations, especially of herself, and tackles topics such as sexual assault and journalism related thereto, consumerism, and what the internet is doing to all of our brains in both large and deeply personal ways.
Without intending to, I seem to have fallen into a theme of adaptations of ancient Greek myths of late! You may remember some previous favorites like The Song of Achilles and Lore Olympus in this vein. I now am thrilled to include this novel which is a haunting take on the Antigone story, with a brilliant twist. The ancient themes of divided loyalties between family, state, piety, and morality are still there but set in modern Britain and the rebellion that divides the famous siblings against the state is the rebellion of their brother in running away to join the Islamic State. It’s beautiful and absolutely devastating. Don’t you dare ruin it for yourself, but the final page will cause you to lose your breath.
My darling literature lovers and fellow liberal arts majors, gather round the podcasting fire to enjoy this hilarious independent podcast called F**** Bois of Literature. A funny and feminist review of all the characters in literature who we may love, but know in our hearts to be deeply problematic. Tropes and themes, genres and genders, myth and modern masculinity…it’s all on the table and hilariously explored.
A podcast from Slate, this joyous celebration of unabashed thirstiness and horniness is laugh out loud funny, as if you were sitting around with your friends indulging in sheer aesthetic appreciation of the finer specimens of the human form. And (crucially!) it manages to do this in a way that isn’t gross in the slightest. Truly a feat in our day and age!
Still going. Still grateful.
Coziness is a much underrated sensation, but it’s one that I actively pursue at this time of year. To that end I purchased a cheapish cashmere sweater whose primary function is only to keep me feel toasty in bed. It’s bougie as hell, but I do not regret this decision at all. Slipping into my sleeping sweater has added a nice little tactile moment to bedtime and I consider it money well spent!
See above comment about coziness. My first pair of shearling slippers were worn to a thread and I cheerfully replaced them a few weeks ago for shuffling about the house and keeping toasty. My godmother was the first person who really sold me on specialist foot gear for warmth and snugness by religiously gifting me slip resistant chenille socks for every year I was at university, but these may be an upgrade!
Small Dog Syndrome 