Tag: Husband

Humor, Husband, Life

Who’s In Charge Here?

“Children have one kind of silliness, as you know, and grown-ups have another kind.”
– C.S. Lewis

J. and I both had, “Oh dear, we’re grown up…” moments last night.

J.’s experience was in a grocery store where he heard two girls talking about graduating, and they looked so young! “There are full grown adults,” he said, with some resignation in his voice, “who are younger than us.”

This is a pretty surprising thing, to be honest.  Working at a university, living in a university town, it gets a bit easy to smugly lump the majority of the residence together as “those helpless little darlings,” that you tend to see the most of – freshmen and sophmores who generally haven’t a clue.  But we’ve lived here long enough post my graduation that entire class of students has cycled through their four year degrees and scampered off to greater things.  To many of them, we are their Five Year Plan personified – there’s horror for you.

My clash with age was at my zumba class where for fun the instructor taught us the routine to Michael Jackson’s Thriller, which I thought was great fun for the upcoming holiday spirit.  Walking out of the gym, I overheard two girls talking to one another.
“I liked it except for that weird monster dance we did.”
“Yeah, it wasn’t even a good song.”
Cue C. clutching herself in horror.

The decade I was born in is now something to be trotted out in fashion or for parties, usually “ironically.”  I lived before the internet – something we’re only a couple of freshman classes away from being ancient history.  I lived during the bleeding Cold War, when the Soviet Union was a country, Europe was split down the middle, and communism was still a threat, instead of a largely pejorative term to be hurled at anyone who disagrees with you socially.   And these people have no idea who Michael Jackson was except for the last few, collapsing years of his life!  What gives!

J.’s less than a month away from 27, which somehow seems unnervingly closer to 30 than 26 for some reason, and he’s only seven months older than me.  We’re the grown ups.

Dear heavens…

Humor, Husband, Marriage

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

“There are many men of principle in both parties in America, but there is no party of principle.”
~Alexis de Tocqueville

You know, sometimes I take a lot of things about J. for granted (he’s a really impressive specimen), but now and then his stellar points are highlighted.  A friend recently took me aside to ask if J. and I are politically in sync, because she suspected we weren’t and wondered how we dealt with it.  Election season has come to her house and she and her husband are not exactly aligned.  I was torn between thinking, “Oh, look, we are the very model of a modern [major] marriage,” and, “Ha!  Fooled another one!”  But on reflection, I was reminded again just how much I appreciate J. for the fact that he profoundly respects my right to disagree.

Working at a police department gives me ample evidence that not all marriages are like this.  Our congregation, nice as it can be, often provides examples that not all marriages are like this.  Even among some friends I’ve seen relationships made of people who do not respect the right to have differing opinions.  And this has always bothered me because it seems like such a basic human thing – if I demand the right to think and believe what I will, without reference to any other person, surely that means I have an obligation to render than same right to others.  My marriage is like that, all my close friendships are like that, but is it a commonality or a rare thing?

It is shocking to me how many people in marriages, partnerships, and friendships do not give one another the right to disagree.  How do you get through the day, much less an election season!  Every opinion is a potential battle, every thought a potentially traitorous action – it must be exhausting.  I know it is, I’ve seen so many people exhausted by it.

J. and I are not politically aligned (he’s center, I’m left of center), we’re not identical religiously, and widely divided on sports – but it doesn’t matter.  Our ethics line up, the values we look for in others we find in one another, we are a team.  When we disagree, we assume that the other person has come to their opinion through thought, personal experience, and logic, and we do not call one another idiots, bombard one another with new clippings (of varying degrees of authenticity), or rail against the other.  We do not make it a project to overhaul one another consciences.

I used to think this sort of relationship was normal.  I’m starting to wonder if I’m lucky.

Sound off, ducklings, I know many of you have wonderful friendships and relationships unaffected by dogmas of any kind.  Have you ever been in a situation where dogma made a work relationship, friendship, or family situation uncomfortable (goodness knows I have!), and how did you make it work?  Restore my faith in people during political open season!

Family, Humor, Husband, PBS

Reason #498 Why I Love My Marriage

“I have witnessed and enjoyed the first act of everything which Wagner created, but the effect on me has always been so powerful that one act was quite sufficient; whenever I have witnessed two acts I have gone away physically exhausted; and whenever I have ventured an entire opera the result has been the next thing to suicide.”
– Mark Twain

PBS (my Great American Love) is in the middle of doing Wagner’s entire Ring Cycle on it’s Great Performances at the Met program, starting with an introductory program on the staging of Robert Lepage’s fantastical set for the Met’s production.  We’re loving it and staying up way too late to enjoy it.  And we would feel bad about listening to Wagner late at night except that our neighbors have been treating us to a  rather tone deaf rendition of Les Miserables for the better part of the week.   We’ll see your French suffering and raise you the fall of the German/Icelandic gods.

Of course, tonight is Die Walkure, so we had to prepare properly.  Naturally by watching this.

The Small Dog editorial team: mature, educated, cultured.

Humor, Husband, London, Travel, Work

Room With A View

“I have no use for body guards, but I have very specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.”
– Elvis Presley

This is the office where J. will be working next year:

And this is the view out of the front door of said building:

Why, yes, that is the Tower.

Now, minions, I need to find an equally impressive job, or at least one with an equally impressive scenery.

Humor, Husband, London, School, Travel, University

London Day Four: Gowns and Graduation

“At commencement you wear your square-shaped mortarboards.  My hope is that from time to time you will let your minds be bold, and wear sombreros.”
~ Paul Freund

This was our day to be Very Serious, kittens, since it was sort of the point of the whole trip.  We spent almost the whole day in Covent Garden with only a few meanderings into Soho.

Getting dressed for the occasion.
The director offers a few words of last minute advice.
Done.

I’m unbelievably proud of that guy.  He worked incredibly hard, and it wasn’t a fun nine months, but it paid off.

Humor, Husband, Life, London, Travel

Weather and Whining

“Henry, I’m tired.”
“Sleep then.”
– The Lion in Winter

I can’t talk about Saturday, kittens.  Let’s just say the travel gods are fickle and leave it at that.

J. and I spent yesterday, our anniversary, in and out of fogs.  Up late packing, up early to the airport left us in quite a state.  We both fell into unplanned naps throughout the afternoon, watched some movies, and I taught J. how to play Rummy and he trounced me at it.  Romantic?  Not particularly.  We’re delaying our celebration until we’re in London in a week.

Sidenote: a week!  Life needs to slow down, I’m tired!

Also, the weather gods seem to be in a mood. We need to throw a virgin into a volcano or something.
Family, Friends, Humor, Husband, Shopping, Weekend

Monday, Ho!

“Ahh, what a day! Up at 6:00, a 10-mile run in the sleet, and NOW a big bowl of plain oatmeal! How I love the crazy hedonism of weekends!”
– Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

I indulged this past weekend, minions.  I may have overindulged, in fact!

Let’s burn plastic  and worry about doing penance on Monday.

I’ve had a self-imposed shopping ban in place for months now, saving up for a major shopping trip, and I finally took it.  Woof.  There was carnage, kittens.  And then I went to a movie and dinner with my godfamily to round off my weekend of hedonism, because between weddings and assorted craziness we haven’t been able to play as much lately and that needed to be rectified.

Now the Small Dog clan is going on austerity measures until the holidays – Germany would adore us.

J.’s back in town tonight, permanently, no more cross continental marriage!  And immediately I drag him to an out of state wedding this weekend, we have another godfamily dinner at the start of next week, I head out to the Flyboy’s Wedding Part Deux in Louisiana the Saturday after, and the next day is our three year anniversary.  Life events are like buses, none come for huge stretches and then they all come all at once!

Humor, Husband, Linkstorm, London, Weekend

Friday Links XIX

“For Children: You will need to know the difference between Friday and a fried egg. It’s quite a simple difference, but an important one. Friday comes at the end of the week, whereas a fried egg comes out of a chicken. Like most things, of course, it isn’t quite that simple. The fried egg isn’t properly a fried egg until it’s been put in a frying pan and fried. This is something you wouldn’t do to a Friday, of course, though you might do it on a Friday. You can also fry eggs on a Thursday, if you like, or on a cooker. It’s all rather complicated, but it makes a kind of sense if you think about it for a while.”
– Douglas Adams

Last week was no good, pumpkins, my hormones went all crazy and I ate copious amount of terribly bad for me food.  I’ve been trying to get back on track this week and it hasn’t been any fun.  Food/Exercise morality is hateful.

Salad?!

But then – then!  On Monday J. got a job offer in London!  And if you think I’m complaining about anything for weeks to come, you’re nuts.  Here are your links, kittens!  I’ll be spending the weekend celebrating my birthday (!), checking in on the Queen’s Jubilee, checking out a new exhibit at the Museum of Art (courtesy of the V&A, so you know I have to go), and being a bit lazy.  How about you?

I burst into hysterical giggles checking these out.

Too bizarre.

If you’re celebrating the Jubilee with a G&T and dread a watery cocktail bringing you down, or just want your lemonade to look extra fancy at the next neighborhood barbeque, I think these oversize ice cube trays are nifty!

Very scary and upsetting, not for the faint hearted.  (On a less somber and highly inappropriate note, I’m pretty sure this is how the zombie apocalypse starts…)

Marie’s style is preppy, Kiri’s is French country, Nora’s is pure mid-century American.  My decorating tastes (inherited directly and unadulterated from my mum) are hardwood floors in houses stuffed to the brim with antiques and treasures from world travels, interspersed with trendy art that can be altered to fit the times.  There is probably no place for this in my Someday House.  Which means I may have to undergo a complete style makeover to accommodate it.

I have seen these fabulous riffs on vintage floating around the internet for months and I had no idea a genius company was behind it.  I have presents for the girls covered for years off of this site!  I’m craving this one in particular – because I am pretty sure this phrase has crossed the lips of of myself and everyone I have every considered to be a true friend.

Tumblr of the week: for my fellow expats, travelers, gypsy souls, or generally lost friends.  And for those of you who just love to travel.

Old news, but new to me.  Technology is weird.

I suffer from pasta portion control.  Therefore, this thingy is fantastic.

More kitchen stuff!  I am not prepared to pay the money for these, but the tiny organizer in me thinks these would save a lot of space.

Scary!  Women: know your finances!  I’ll the the first to admit that J. does most of the financial research in our family (he’s an accountant after all), but without trying to sound like an idiot or helpless female, he takes time to explain financial concepts to me if I don’t understand them well.  I also try to educate myself about the economic state of the world, country, and my family.  He may be the financial wizard, but there isn’t a single financial decision made that we don’t talk about and come to an agreement on – from food budgets to student loans.  Lady minions – this is important!

Spring is nearly over, but I think we can all agree that these brings out the country gentry in all of us, right?

Recipe to try (and one of the cuter ex-pat blogs out there).

Here’s your weekly sheep, and good luck to you.