Weekend Links

We’re two months into the year, a full sixth. Sigh.

Why yes, let’s talk about Ken Burns’ hair, what a pleasant break from reality!

Goodness, whomever could have seen this coming? What a shock. /s

Someone turn this saga into a movie, right away. Part 1 and Part 2.

Climate change models have been predicting this for literal decades and speaking collectively, we have avoided doing anything meaningful to prevent it. It is now going to be catastrophically costly, but in terms money and human life and capital, to respond to.

At a time when the majority of Americans support gay rights, more than half a decade after the Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage, it’s clear that a growing percentage of the U.S. population identifies as LGBT, Gallup’s researchers said. What’s less clear is why. Is it because of a real shift in sexual orientation and gender identity? Or is it because of a greater willingness among young people to identify as LGBT?Great piece from the WaPo about changing gender and sexual identity, a complicated topic.

What IS non-binary identity, you ask? Here you go.

And while we’re at it, your notions of non-heteronormative identity (specifically trans and non-binary) may have some toxic prejudices lurking in your psyche…which you may not even be aware of! That’s okay, most of us have implicit biases of which we’re not even aware, much less aware of how they got there. If you’re interested in how the most common assumptions about trans identities wended their way through pop culture and possibly into your brain…media critic Lindsey Ellis is here to blow your mind:

Seen some of these blighters in our rubbish bin area and they scare the life out of me.

No heroes, only (temporary) allies.

Excellent nerd lead here, but also a genuinely interesting piece on how the Kardashians have changed beauty and self-image. Whether you want to care or not, they’ve been hugely influential.

EXCUSE ME, they never “left.”

If you’re not watching Wandavision, what’s wrong with you?

Weekend Links – the Cataline Conspiracy, only stupid

Hi kittens, still depressed but getting better slowly.

Also, since I seem to be something of a statistic…are we all hitting a wall, or are we all just coming to grips with a series of crippling failures on top of one another? Strongly starting to suspect it may the latter.

First and foremost: how to help people in Texas right now.

Another crowdsourced masterdoc on how to help.

Long live Larry.

The best description I have for my ovearching feeling about Trump is contempt, he’s so pathetic and unworthy as both a person and a leader that I’m loathe to give him more credit than he’s due (even though I believe he’s responsible for so much damage). But I have no hesitation in saying that I hate Minority Leader McConnell. He’s very good at wielding power, and is a savvy politician, for which even I can admit to having a bizarre sort of grudging respect for sheer Machiavellian instinct. Years ago I told my brother that I thought he was the most important politician in DC and I stand by that…which is why I hate him so much. I hate him for choosing power over principle and if not embracing then condoning the very worst in our society if it kept him in power. More than anyone else in the Trump years, he could have chosen and steered a different path for our institutions, and every single time he didn’t. And even now, he tries to thread this needle as though the timing of the Senate trial wasn’t dictated by himself and I hate him for it.

Tl;dr: McConnell is clearly pulling a Ceasar as told by Sallust…and yeah, how did that go in the long run, Julius?

If they think they can just pretend he’ll go away, they’re delusional. And anyone who has ever known a malignant narcissist in a bad relationship will tell you, he will need to reassert control over you to protect his own self image (brand, if you will). And like a malignant narcissist in a bad relationship, he will compel you to do a lot of horrible things that in the long term are utterly against your own and everyone else’s wellbeing to keep you tied to him and in line.

Yeah…this is straight up eugenics.

Grim indictment of leadership.

PROTECT ELIZABTH ANN AT ALL COSTS.

More important Black History Month journalism, this time first person slavery accounts. I find it jarring but vitally important to see images of former slaves taken in the 20th century, similar to Civil War vets driving around in Model Ts. We are not nearly as far away from this history as people find comfort in thinking we are.

Pinning the blame for political violence on the lunatic fringe, rather than ordinary members of society, is a comforting lie folks tell themselves to avoid the reality of our political situation, how we’ve gotten to this point, and the possible futures leading forward from here.”

Yay, science!

Photo of the day.

Brava to FKA Twigs for confronting domestic abuse and violence as it should be done.

Control over our own bodies and reproductivity is foundational and fundamental to almost every other autonomous right women claim. It is the historical difference between our ability to be free individuals and citizens (it’s not a mistake that suffrage and reliable birth control came along at roughly the same time) and actual legal property. Anytime women lose this control, demand how, who did it, and why they did it or allowed it to happen. Wherever it happens.

Look, let’s be blunt. Ted Cruz, an anti-immigrationist, climate change denying, healthcare legislation enemy and bad faith blowhard needing to just “get a little break” from the ravages of huge weather catastrophe battering the area of the country it is quite literally his job to protect and represent, and so fleeing to a country he routinely derides for a luxury vacation…all against the BACKDROP of a once-in-a-generation public health crisis is almost too perfect an example of irony. Like, this was cooked up in the cosmic writers’ room in the ninth circle of hell, it’s that spot on. It’s objectively hilarious alongside being grim.

Much like Rush Limbaugh in passing, he deserves the derision he’s getting NOT because it’s fun to whale on people. Even if Senator Cruz seems to have made himself so unpleasant that even his allies have very little to say that’s positive about him. It’s because when you make it your entire lifelong career and personality to take public and powerful positions, and use actual power to back those positions ups, your actions and behavior can and should be judged against that body of work. And if the lens of attention is harsh, that’s truly on you to examine why that may be and make choices accordingly. Either do better, or double down into your own villainy; repent or commit. But for god’s sake stop whining to us all about cancel culture in bad faith.

Speaking of media literacy, journalist specializing in the topic of misinformation Charlie Warzel has a fascinating piece on the subject that made me think this week:

Weekend Links

Hi darlings, your internet aunty is deep in the throws of a depression spiral over here, so this note won’t be as perky or as snappy as usual. Like everyone else, I seem to have hit some kind of horrible wall recently. Must be the upcoming one year anniversary of our LATEST bout of existential threat or something. Seasonal depression, meets pandemic depression, meets normal depression.

In between multiple bouts of crying every day, I’ve slapped together a surprisingly good bunch of links for your reading pleasure. Seriously, there is a lot of great and fun stuff for you this week, just in case like me you are completely unable to summon any serotonin.

The Senate of the United States, having a normal one over here…

Our building has seemed suspiciously quiet for a while now

My long term thirst for Henry Cavill over most of the competition was and remains solid evident of my good taste. And is there any more petty but thrilling pleasure than when your aesthetic preference is also acknowledged to have been The Correct Choice? It’ so satisfying. The Man From UNCLE is still a great and underappreciated movie, though.

REDWALLLLLLL!

Oh good, only a year and change too late.

Friend of the Blog Caitlin Kelly strikes again, on how Bridgerton’s influence is only beginning, and how it’s giving whole communities of experts and enthusiasts their due.

Speaking of costuming, let me recommend a couple of channels and creators to truly send you down a rabbit hole this weekend:
Abby Cox, a dress historian specializing in the 18th century and not afraid to Go There when it comes to stuff you really want to know about boobs, periods, corsetry, and more. She’s also hilarious, historically rigorous, and just an overall feminist delight. Bernadette Banner, an Edwardian expert and former Broadway costumer who uses her personal experience with scoliosis to delve into dismantling myths about shapewear, highlights traditional craftsman and houses, and roasts fast fashion using medieval tailoring. She’s a babe. I particularly recommend her latest vid about the effects of Bridgerton on athleticwear. Yes, really.

Overdue but still very welcome for Black History Month. We would not have almost any genre of American music, much less global dittos, without the unique heritage of Black culture and pioneers.

Well well well, if it isn’t the consequences of our actions

What a badass.

Likewise, what a gent–even when no longer with us.

As per usual, Ronan Farrow (speaking to Amanour and Company) breaks down the differences in the insurrectionist mob of January 6th, what separates them, and what unites them in thoughtful and accessible ways. Worth a watch:

My honest to goodness reaction at seeing this story was, “OMG look at the itty bitty dinosaur!”

Anti-Asian racism and racist incidents are on the rise, including for Pacific Islanders and many ethnic and racial groups that come under that broad category. Don’t forget that we can and must advocate for several communities individually as well as under broad umbrellas such as “immigration” and “people of color.” If your privilege protects you against certain bigotries, stand up for individual communities as well as broad groups. These are not mutually exclusive.

Ignoring the headline, which I expect will put some people off, this is an excellent discussion on the role of conservatism can play in preserving democracy or breaking it. Ardent and die-hard leftist that I am, I actually agree with the thesis that it’s the behaviors of the right that really determine the path of governments because they are often the institutional guardians of what we retain and why, while the left’s role is (broadly speaking) to push for change. Both of the institutional tensions need to exist in healthy ways for democracy to work.

Good. Because I have no faith that the Senate will impose any consequences. Literally none.

This week I learned a fascinating piece of history for the first time, and one that showcases the complexities of racial privilege in America. Mixed race families, slavery and sexual consent, “passing,” and class differences all rolled into one, and a Second Lady you have never heard of.

I AM NOT A CAT. The 2021 battlecry of everyone who has utterly lost the Zoom plot.

Congresswoman Greene, or Please Learn How to Walk and Chew Gum

Gather round, pumpkins, it’s controversial opinion time. I look forward to the thoughtful discourse/vicious attacks in the comments.

There’s Something about Marjorie

Let’s set some important priors to this before we continue.

First and foremost, I think Marjorie Taylor Greene’s views are repugnant and dangerous, have no place in public life, and being stripped of her roles on budgetary and education committees (which she was appointed to by Republican leadership, please remember) is wholly adequate following scrutiny of those views. I want her nowhere near my money or the education of my nieces, nephews, and godchildren, to say anyone else’s small fry. She is, as my British friends would say, bonkers.

Second, it is correct that she is being scrutinized and held accountable for these views. Her QAnon social media vids are a significant part of how she rose to prominence enough to run for Congress in the first place – and those videos and many of her social media posts are still available if you want to track them down and view what she has said and when. It is therefore appropriate to consider these opinions with her current political power and influence since they are key contributing factors to how she achieved both.

Third, she is not being cancelled and this discourse is getting old. The far right has had a good run getting prime time news slots, media specials, bestselling book deals, entire social media channels, and the podiums of the actual seats of our government to yell about how silenced they are. It’s bad faith and I can’t wait for the term to go back to referring to loss of popularity or attention – which is not the same thing as hard power.

So…with those priors…

I’m getting kind of pissed that she has become the QAnon boogeyman. Really. Let me explain.

We Need to Talk About Kevin. And Josh. And Rafael–I mean, Ted.

Marjorie Taylor Greene is a newly elected congresswoman, her first position in government at any level. By all means let’s hold her to account…

But do you know who also needs the spotlight kept on them right now? Senator Josh Hawley, a longtime political operative at state level and since 2019 an established sitting senator, who is also known to be positioning himself for a White House run in the mold of a successor to Donald Trump and Trumpist populism albeit a more methodically minded one. This includes up to and including carrying water for the lie that the 2016 election result was suspect and announcing his intention to vote against certifying it. Which you may remember as the conspiracy theory that led to the American Capitol building being stormed by extremists last month.

While we’re at it, he has use dogwhistle language which is typically used by the far right to avoid outright statements of antisemitism, called the Mueller investigation a hoax (sidenote, do any of these people know what a hoax means? The Lock Ness Monster is a hoax, the Mueller investigation definitely happened), and claimed that human trafficking is a result of the sexual revolution of the 1960s. Which again, is coded language around traditional gender and racial expectations, but do your own research into this; there is excellent academic and media literacy tools around this and I’m getting tired of having to explain it to bad faith debaters. He’s also on record in writing stating that, “Government serves Christ’s kingdom rule; this is its purpose.” Cool. Theocracy. At least he’s being honest about it.

Now since the Capitol Riot he has a book deal and complained (loudly and multiple times on international media platforms) that this is more evidence of cancel culture. And again, I’m tired of saying this but a sitting senator, serving on the Committees of Armed Services, Security, and the Judiciary is…um… not cancelled at all. He’s in fact incredibly powerful with a lot of equally powerful and influential people required to pay attention to him (which is why it took a literal act of insurrection to get a sitting US President kicked off his platforms). Hawley isn’t being silenced, he can’t be. He’s just getting less popular as more people outside his supportive echo chamber become aware of his tracker record, which I think is a great thing.

And in the same corner, we have his colleague Senator Ted Cruz who also has White House ambitions, who also kowtowed to Trump/Trumpism (even when he was the victim of some of their earlier conspiracy theories and bullshit), who also refused to certify the election results,

He has also been a sitting senator since 2013, sits on the Committees of the Judiciary, Foreign Relations, and Commerce, Science, and Transportation. Beating a dead horse here but, in spite of an almost mythologically bad feelings from anyone who has had the misfortune to work with him in government over the years, this guy is pretty powerful. He’s a regular on the right wing media circuit and like many of his part has swung further and further into the wingnut areas over the last few years.

And in the House, since we’re listing people who outrank and outweigh Congresswoman Greene, let’s not forget Kevin McCarthy whose ostensible job it is to promote or reign in his subbordinates.

All of which leads me to ask…

How Do You Solve a Problem Like Marjorie?

The honest answer to that is to hold the people above her and enabled her rise, who decided to empower her with committee assignments, who have shielded her and other QAnon believes in Congress (more than you might think, fam), who have made the decision to harness radical and repugnant beliefs (whether or not they truly hold them) to solidify power.

Congresswoman Greene deserves the attention she’s getting. She does not deserve to act as a shield for others who deserve as much or even more attention for their views and machinations. You don’t get a Congresswoman Greene without institutional guardians winking at or outright courting what they should be defending against.

I look at this situation and honestly, in spite of my very real and probably ugly disdain for her beliefs, I can’t help but see all the old problems rearing their head.

She’s a woman.

She’s more powerful than you and me maybe, but she is a lot less powerful and historically less influential than others in government who hold or harbor the same views.

She has become the face of QAnon in power, serving to push scrutiny of the Capitol attacks into the background which helps to minimize what it was: a dinky and dumb, but very real sedition attempt. There are other QAnon believers in congress who also need scrutiny, and behind each of them are a shedload of people for whom QAnon and extremism was not a deal breaker.

Attention solely on her is benefitting more entrenched and more powerful men, who have much longer and more effective track records of bad political faith/actions, and who frankly probably represent the likelier threat of extremism becoming embedded permanently in the party via the next presidential election and beyond.

And do you know what? I have no qualms about saying attention and focus on one person – one woman – feels awfully misogynistic in that all too American-hatred-of-women-in-power way. There are a lot of dudes who deserve to lose their committee seats or elected positions right now, but she seems to be the chosen scapegoat. It’s easier to mock, deride, and evict a solitary, relatively defenseless (usually) woman compared to taking on the more entrenched, more powerful, and more threatening in reality (usually) men.

The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest

It goes all the way back to Eve, or at least Salem, but we really seem to need a single villain to focus on these days and when presented with unequal power options and especially male and female versions, we seem to choose the less powerful woman. Every time.

Witch hunts are satisfying to the subconscious, but they don’t actual stop spreading plague or whatever societal ill is causing your current anxiety. Scapegoating feels good because it tricks you into thinking you’ve achieved a victory, when usually nothing systemic has changed.

We need to learn to hold more than one thought in our heads as a society, even when confronting groups as damaging and horrible as I genuinely believe QAnon to be. We have to look complexly at the systems of power and disaffection that surround us. We can have more than one fight at a time, and can share proportion attention where it’s most deserved. We can walk and chew gum at the same time.

So, what’s the real goal here? Flog and humiliate a single, relatively less important woman, or make it truly unviable for a person to hold or harbor this views to hold office? Because if it’s the latter…making an example of Congresswoman Greene isn’t the victory a lot of people seem to think it is.

When the media cycle moves on, Kevin McCarthy (who managed to go from sorta-kinda speaking badly of QAnon a couple of months ago to pretending he doesn’t even know what QAnon is just a couple of days ago), will still be the Minority Leader. Cruz and Hawley will still be plotting their White House runs. And extremism will still be acceptable if not a key tool in the right wing power strategy.

Spend your attention and political capital accordingly.

Weekend Links

After a series of bizarre and bad decisions which has made the per capita infection rate in the UK the worst in the world there for a while, the nation does actually seem to have a grip on the vaccination efforts. LONG LIVE THE NHS.

We’re still likely to be stuck inside until the end of summer. …Hooray?

I’m still amazed no one was removed from office or public life because of this. We live in the upside down.

If you’ve been paying attention to the, uh, utterly ugly and bonkers “Rothschild space lasers” discourse, you may be asking, “Why is antisemitism present in practically every conspiracy theory?”

Extremism, [Mark] Pitcavage said, “is a perennial problem and needs to be dealt with institutionally.”

Grim. Jobs need to be lost over this.

RIP, Sir Tom Captain Moore.

One ecological disaster a time, please?!

If this is the future of influencers, I’ll take it.

If I never hear the screeching retort of, “What about ANTIFA?!” again, it will be too soon. It’s not an organized movement, it’s mostly a few whack job anarchists (opposed to organization by…design?), no leader, no comprehensive agenda, no common cause besides the superficial, and a hilarious amount of discordant ideas amongst the various factions who get slapped with the lable. They are NOT the equivalent of organized, hierarchied, and known fascist or extremist groups.

See above: left and right protests are not managed or policed in the same ways. I’m pretty sure I shared some links to reporting on research on this in a previous links post.

So, we can’t trust our elected government to ensure consequences? Thank goodness we have the…ridiculous US legal system – which has become one of the few ways to enforce personal and now corporate responsibility? Love that for us… (Hope it was worth it all, Fox News.) (ETA: hoo boy, trying HARD to avoid that lawsuit now, aren’t they?)

This post from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation on how we must use the current moment to really reconsider our thinking about global health – often a euphemism for rich, western, white countries benevolently giving to poorer, non-European-descended ones to avoid having to think about the discrepancies in the first place – is worth your time. Globally and locally, public health is something that affects us all, it requires collaboration and participation – and for the love of god, adherence to science and research and not the feelings of a few people who are lucky enough to not have to worry about most communicable diseases and therefore think that means they aren’t really, or something.

The Year of Intention: January

So, I know I JUST talked about this publicly, but in reality I’ve been working on this month’s goals since New Year’s Day. Admittedly with mixed results. But with intention, we’re also practicing generosity this year, kittens because in case you hadn’t notice…times are rough!

Wins:

Fully paid off my credit cards. Holy shit, that feels good to type.

Put an extra 1,000 in savings this month.

Did a month-long break from takeaway food orders – with two exceptions; one listed below and one moment of weakness when the depression hit too hard to cook.

Did a meal prep project every weekend, which definitely contributed to achieving the first two weeks. Also, I am slowly mastering the art of French Onion Soup.

Started physiotherapy for longstanding knee injury and hip joint problems. Twice a week sessions are unmaking years of damage in noticeable time. It’s honestly a bit shaming to think how long I just didn’t get around to getting help for this stuff.

Read a book a day – because I can finish romance novels or classic murder mysteries in a single sitting, and because I listen to audiobooks on a least double time walking to and from my physio appointments twice a week. Health hedonism at its best.

Fails:

I was doing Dry January…but then extremists stormed my seat of government and Jeff and I spent nearly 24-hours glued to the news. So we decided pizza and red wine was an acceptable coping mechanism. And – because I’m an unhealth all-or-nothing kind of person, I decided prosecco was also acceptable and continued to indulge. Oops.

Weekend Links

Kittens, I suspect even my mild case of COVID hit me harder than I thought it did. One month on and a persistent feeling of exhaustion remains, and I’m trying to figure out it it’s just the usual January blues, the pandemic lockdown blues, or the widely touted longer term effects of the disease which has officially killed over 100,000 people in the UK.

Chicken and egg, eh? Am I broken…or is the world just kinda like this now?

I have no conclusions. Scholars remain divided.

Anyway, in spite of…everything…there are moments of joy to celebrate. Hannah’s THIRD book was announced, and X got engaged! Truly friendships are the balm of the soul, I’m so delighted for my girl squad I could just bust. Here’s your usual mix of Deep and Dumb from the internet to get you through the last weekend of the first month of this sure-to-be-cursed year.

We are still finding out more about the Capitol raid and ProPublica has a great (if somewhat distressing) compliation piece on the POV from Parler before it lost its hosting options. Sidenote, the whole attempt by the GOP to just pretend that January 6th never happened is sort of making me lose my mind.

And as America has exported QAnon conspiracy theories across the Atlantic, European conspiracy theories and disinformation are also making their way to the United States.”

I think people aren’t nearly concerned enough with the Fermi paradox overall, but that’s just me. If the universe is empty but for us…why? And if it’s not…where is everybody?

Everything Is Broken. “If…the idea of mass brokenness seems both excruciatingly correct and also paralyzing, come sit with me. Being on a ship nearly 4 million square miles in area along with 330 million other people and realizing the entire hull is pockmarked with holes is terrifying. But being afraid to face this reality won’t make it less true. And this is the reality.”

100,000 people are dead in the UK and still these people

If you want it in a sentence, I guess it goes something like this: The GameStop saga is a ludicrous stock mania born of pandemic boredom and FOMO, piggybacking off of a clever Reddit revenge plot, which targeted hedge funds, who made a reckless bet on a struggling retailer—and it’s going to end with lots of people losing incredible amounts of money.” It was a wild week on Wall Street, fam.

Facts may not care about your feelings, but your partisan view does not care about facts. That’s bad and scary for all of us.

Trauma-bonded nostalgia for the 90s and how the 30-year cycle of reboots displays itself in pop culture and politics. Also summarized generational anxiety in its current form more succinctly than anything else I’ve come across: “…and young people don’t feel trapped by the future, because nobody believes in the future anymore.” But also a plea to give up on nostalgia and try brave and terrifying alternative possibilities instead.

My freshman year roommate at university and I had a theory, that The Emperor’s New Groove is the most quotable movie of all time and that there is a quote for practically every occasion. I have yet to be proved wrong.

The gamers are at it again.

Natalie strikes again. This video is nominally about TERF doublespeak, but as per usual, is also a parable for so many more issues related to bigotry and what underpins it. It’s also a timely examination as to how all kinds of groups use specific language techniques to have the conversations they WANT to have (“Why should I be forced to think trans identities are valid?”) instead of the conversation that actually IS happening (“Do people deserve respect, legal autonomy and human rights?”).

Introducing the Year of Intention

I don’t want to end up simply having visited this world
– When Death Comes, Mary Oliver

This is nearly a month late, even though it’s been sitting in my drafts folder since December. It never felt right to finish or post something so self-centered given all the genuinely huge and existential stuff going on at the start of the year. But since this weird little corner of the internet is where I document and ponder on stuff, I didn’t want to put it off any longer.

As has been mentioned, resolutions are useless; I prefer themes. And that’s in a NORMAL year, which I’ve pretty well assumed 2021 will not be.

This broader framework approach to success and growth feels especially necessary this year because the truth is, who the hell knows what’s going to happen this year! Best and unlikeliest case, we’re all out of our homes and back to “normal” by April – which is not going to happen. Worst case society collapses and we join up with a roving band of warriors to survive in a post-apocalyptical landscape. And between is a literal infinite amount of possibilities. One or both of us might lose our jobs, or we may get promotions. We may have to move, or we may need to extend our lease. We may get vaccinated or we may have to wait months for our number to be called.

Who. The. Hell. Knows.

Staying motivated through monotony is challenging.

Finding contentment in isolation or confinement requires a lot of mental practices, discipline and gratitude being chief among them.

Trying to conceptualize a future while surviving a horrible present is rough.

Trying to mark time without the benefit of observing holidays and enjoying seasonal change is antithetical to the entirety of human experience!

That being said, I do think that it’s possible to live intentionally, regardless of circumstances, and that’s why I chose the theme I did. 2020 felt like something that happened to us that we had to constantly catch up and respond to, we were living reactively – and that’s okay! But in 2021 I want to find ways to live more proactively, even if circumstances stay as they are for a long while. In fact, I think it’s best to assume they will, and plan accordingly. So what is intentional living going to look like for me?

Financial: a new big picture

Being intentional in our financial planning. But wait, C., don’t do you have the same goals every year? Not exactly, dear minion, let me explain my feelings.

2021 is going to be the year we (hopefully) see the end of our debt, which has been a long time coming and which has been my “big picture” motivation for a long time. And that means I need a new big goal to think about and use as a north star. While I think this is going to take shape in several micro goals or challenges throughout the year, as is my want, the new big intention is to make significant progress towards home ownership through savings and new investments. Small projects are fun, but I find they work best when deployed in service of a bigger vision, and buying a house feels like a bold new horizon to shoot for.

Health: healing, not coping

I mentioned in my last yearly theme post feeling burdened by emotional or psychological weight I don’t want to drag around with me anymore. This is perhaps a bit woo woo and fluffy for some, but I want to approach my both mental and physical health and energy in 2021 with a forward-looking intention. Jeff and I were talking about how many minor small issues we’ve just sort of lived with and accepted with our health rather than trying to find permanent solutions.

Rather than coping with old traumas and managing health issues, I want to use the resources I have like therapy and my healthcare access to truly heal what I can and make better choices about what I can’t.

This may mean leaving behind or changing relationship dynamics with some people. It may mean seeking a second opinion on certain issues to see if I can get better outcomes. It may mean choosing the more invasive option rather than the therapeutic one to try and fix stuff permanently – and yes, this is both literal and metaphoric, roll with it.

Ultimately I want to feel more that my health and wellbeing is something I’m making deliberate and intentional choices about, and less something that’s happening to me. I kicked this off a bit early by scheduling a health assessment over the Christmas break to get a battery of testing done and some one-to-one time with both a nurse and doctor to review the results.

Pleasure: an obscure goal for healthy hedonism

This is a strange one to try and articulate, but I have sort of assumed that no matter how much I may wish it, my physical world may be very small this year. But for me, part of living intentionally means finding ways to maximize the pleasant and positive sensations I am able to cultivate. I hope to be able to travel to one of my brother’s weddings this summer, but I can definitely enjoy various kinds of media without guilt or snobbery. I hope to be able to see my best friends this year, but I can certainly choose to wear fancy pajamas on the weekend or when I work from home. I hope to be able lounge on a beach with my husband, but barring that I can definitely have a weekly fun night at home.

There is a culture taboo against coziness, comfort, and rest but these are things that I want to lean into this year. I’m not talking about mindlessly scrolling the interwebs until going to sleep, but I do mean intentionally seeking out media, experiences (as far as I am able), and sensory opportunities that are based purely on healthy hedonism. What feels good, does not harm others, and allows me to pass time during lockdown isn’t just acceptable, it’s to be lauded!

This might mean dressing prettily for no reason, it might mean enjoying “fluffy” media of some kind, it might mean eating more decadent food than I should (though it might also mean choosing to, say, stretch for twenty minutes rather than do a vigorous exercise regimen). Trying to find things that feel deliberately good and comforting does not necessarily mean indulgence, greed, or wanton disregard for consequence. And if ever there was a year to try and discover the difference and fine tune the balance, I think this is it!

Do you have a theme this year? What made you choose it and what do you think it’s going to look like?

Weekend Links

It’s amazing how much better I have felt this week after the US inauguration. I didn’t realize until it was over how frightened I was for something ugly and dramatic to happen and disrupt or derail the day.

Now, the background buzzing dread of a pandemic badly handled in both my native and adopted countries, heightened political tensions, and general instability is still humming away. Don’t get me wrong, things are still bad, but I am enjoying the sensation that the institutions that govern a large portion of my and my loved ones lives aren’t actively making things worse on purpose.

In other words, I’m excited to return to a world of unintentional mistakes instead of willful ignorance or malicious intent. Humble goals, fam.

This week I’ve found plenty of fun things to read, but I’m clearly still concerned about the next phases of extremism and alternative realities which have taken over too many people’s lives. It’s a mistake to think that these worldviews or behaviors are going away.

Well, yo ho ho.

This article is a profile of a single person, but is an excellent perspective into the wider movement. “For her, QAnon was always less about Q and more about the crowdsourced search for truth. She loves assembling her own reality in real time, patching together shards of information and connecting them to the core narrative.”

I’ve shared this before but it’s worth reupping right now. Particularly the aspect of “forcing the end” in extremist movements, and in the wake of the Capitol storming. Yes, it’s the length of a film. Get some popcorn and watch it anyway.

So, what is going on with QAnon you ask? Well, predictably, some people are going through a faith and grief crisis…and already others are doubling down again. And they are already being targeted by other extremists groups for recruitment. Again.

A really interesting interview on why too many people (guilty!) are looking to European fascism in the 20th century to explain radicalism in the US and we need to look closer to home in our own Civil War and Reconstruction.

How to create a healthier media environment for yourself in 2021.

Honestly, just grim. Necessary (for both military and law enforcement more generally), but grim:

Oh look, that thing I’ve been worrying about for a long time now and fully anticipate we’ll have to deal with next.

WE’VE BEEN SCAMMED INTO BELIEVING Q!!!” a Telegram user declared. “WHAT NOW?!?!?! Indeed, random QAnon Avatar.

Palate cleanser of pure delight.

I’m looking forward to seeing a lot more VP coverage in general, as (not entirely unlike the role of First Lady), it’s a job that seems to get a lot of ceremonial attention but less practical. And in the last administration the coverage was frankly tabloidesque – understandably. That being said, I ate up this insight into the temporary VP residence with a spoon. I need that 18th century teal wallpaper.

And in a typical display of howling hypocrisy from me, loved this insight into inaugural fashion for Dr. Biden.

I’m still awash in delight at the Moment that Bridgerton has produced in the cultural zeitgeist. More fantasy! More women’s POV! More sex positivity! More over the top fluff just because it feels good and is fun to enjoy! At some point I’m going to have to do a full post on it. In the meantime, if over embellished tops and embroidery on the Zoom calls, tea sets, and thirsting over male forearms is the new normal, I’ll take it.

POW. Right in the feels

Apocalypse

It means “disclosure” or the “revelation of great knowledge.” Of course we’ve twisted the ancient Greek word for two millennia and layered new usages on it so it now means some kind of desolation, a wastescape. Some look forward to it, convinced it will benefit them (and deliberately harm or condemn their enemies), others view it primarily through the lens of media and pop culture usuage.

It’s fitting.

Trump’s presidency ends in mere hours when I’m typing theis and for all the harm and damage I believe it caused – which we will spend a long time repairing, from our pandemic response, to wealth inequality, to our national standing in the wider world – I do give it enormous credit for something important: it revealed.

It revealed the racism and misogyny still rooted deep in American history and institutions, and how insidious offshoots manifest everywhere.

It revealed the motives of extremists of all stripes. It promoted or sheltered ideologies by forgoing dog whistles in favor outright declarations.

It revealed how much of our government relies on honor and shame as preventatives – which both should bring some degree of comfort considering who has come before and what they have decided not to do, and should serve as testament how manifestly inadequate they are as guardrails in the

It revealed the collaboration between populism and plutocracy. It laid bare how specific audiences are whipped up to identity-based furor to claim power, before turning around using that power to benefit a very different audience entirely.

It revealed the difference between popularity and power. Both have limits and uses and taking the advice of Machiavelli to heart, the one that chooses power is likeliest to take the necessary steps to hold onto it even at the expense of popularity – or representing a majority of the people.

It revealed a cultural spirit of spite that I found genuinely breathtaking in its malice and breadth.

It revealed the fissures of race, class, and other identity markers and how

It revealed (or certainly reiterated) just how the tattered threads of our so-called safety net truly are, and therefore how fragile our overall systems are in the face of shock.

And finally, it was a powerful revelation to many, many groups of people that democracy requires and demands participation. And the administration provoked response and organization in truly unprecedented ways.

My greatest worry now is that with the intersecting challenges we face as a world and country, too many people will see a new administration as a chance to go back to complacency. Almost none of the circumstances which enabled this man and his people to come to power are resolved. Meaning, as exhausted as we all are and, it could happen again if we aren’t careful. My fear is that Americans tend to have short memories.