Humor, Life, Work

The Monday-est of Mondays

“Monday is a lame way to spend 1/7 of your life.”
– Author Unknown

Weekend was a blur of family photos, a bit of local activism, and many dinners. For the first time in memory, Sunday dinner at my godparents spread out over three tables (plus one for the kids)! All wonderful but not exactly relaxing. Hence when I stumbled through the office doors this morning at that hated time 6:30am, I didn’t even try to force wakefullness; I just set another alarm and fell haphazardly onto the loan sofa in the department. I awoke an hour later covered in some sort of sofa-fuzz that needed a lint roller to resolve, but refreshed and ready to start the day.

Until our housing management company called and said our previous managers did not properly transfer our deposit so they have no record of our prepayment of this month’s rent. Currently, we’re tracking down four year old bank account information to prove ourselves and liking our former managers less and less by the minute (although to be fair we like the new ones quite a bit. We just wish they’d been our managers to start with as I imagine if they had been we would not currently be having these issues). I spent lunch wheedling information out of some people who did not want to give it to me and chasing information up phone trees like a metaphoric cat. And my trainee forgot every single thing I taught her on Thursday – plus she’s taking two days off next week which is two days of training she won’t get and desperately needs, since I only have 16 days left.

Mondays. I do not recommend them. Pizza for (a late) dinner, I think. Onward.

Humor, Linkstorm, Weekend, Writing

Friday Links LXI

“Fridays are the hardest in some ways: you’re so close to freedom.”
― Lauren Oliver

Today is family photo day – and the weather is threatening rain. The photographer (an insanely talented woman who was once a roommate of my sister-in-law’s) has been the family’s go to photographer for well over a decade now and she really is phenomenal. But she’s also almost unnaturally optimistic about weather conditions…we’ll see if her predictions beat the weatherman’s.

Brace for incoming rejections!
Brace for incoming rejections!

In honor of the day, I trotted myself to my stylist over lunch yesterday and had her chop off nearly six inches of hair and I feel free. A couple times a year I’m suddenly seized by the desire to rid myself of all the previous six month’s work of my follicles and I’ve yet to regret it. This weekend I’ve got a dinner at my in law’s, a dinner at my godparents’, an event in the city, and I’m going to send out my first pitch in over two years. Once more into the breach! Let me know what you’re up to in the comments and here are your links:

Great gallery.

My people! I’ve gobbled up Nancy Pearl’s books in particular and have found many favorite books and authors through her.

So, this vegan “leather” jacket is singing a siren song to me. Curse you, shopping ban!

Ah, I have wondered about manners in the digital age. A recent post by the estimable Caitlin Kelly led me down a quick personal meditation on simple manners and going out of your way for people – and the link is well worth a read. I’ve noticed a few trends in the past few years at the PD, but I’m wondering if the minion coterie has opinions (and you always have opinions, don’t you, darlings?) on how people think about interacting with others, particularly as we have more and more ways of doing so with less and less formalized rules.

Vice investigates cat conspiracy theories. I would shake my head, but PD work has convinced me that there are some people out there who are convinced the world is out to get them and concrete is evidence of the government’s involvement.

Infomercials, and more importantly the seemingly incompetent people who star in them, amuse me.

Unsure how you rank in the British class system? The BBC is here to help.

This illustrator decided to take Disney princesses and make their costumes slightly more period accurate. The Maid Marian is hands down my favorite for unexpectedness, and it was also her April Fool’s joke this year.

So. Dr. Suess had this thing for hats…

Holy. Hell. This is frightening, and the next person who tells me rape culture doesn’t exist is getting this link. When children understand what it is and how to use it as a weapon, it’s time to admit our society has a problem.

Humor

Slight Bragging and Gratitude

The fight is won or lost far away from witnesses – behind the lines, in the gym, and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights.
– Muhammad Ali

Still pretty effective, though.
Still pretty effective, though.

Yesterday started out a sad day at the gym, kittens. As a staff member I have access to extracurricular exercise classes for an incredibly low price – one upfront fee gets me into any number of zumba, yoga, weight and interval training, and aerobics classes I choose to take over a semester. It’s pretty great. Alas yesterday was the last class of the term and at the end of April (as is well documented) I’ll be gone from the university.

So after class I took a moment to thank the zumba teacher, who was by far my favorite instructor over the last year and a half. I hate working out, but her classes were the first thing I’ve tried for exercise that I actively enjoyed and under her I’ve lost 15 pounds, gained a bunch of muscle and have a slight cut started in my arm. (In a fabulous Michelle Obama way, not a creepy steroid one, but I digress…) I just wanted to tell her how much I appreciated her classes and how much I would miss them. She asked why I could no longer attend and I explained why I would no longer be staff. Her response: “Girl, you can totally come to my class for free over the summer if you’re still in town. You’ve been working really hard and it’s always great to see you in class so let’s keep you active and healthy!”

Remember to say thank you, kittens. Not with the expectation of getting anything, mind, but people don’t take gratitude for granted and it’s surprising how far people will go for each other after hearing those two little words. Her generosity and kindness really blew me away. And I find the only obligation one has after being the recipient of such an act (besides a sincere handwritten thank you note, possibly supplemented with baked goods) is to pay it forward to someone else when one has the chance. No downside to that.

Humor

A Blurb on Aesthetics

“Huh, I’ve wiped the file?  I’ve wiped all the files? I’ve wiped the internet? Aw, hell I don’t even have a modem!”
– Eddie Izzard

Hola, minions.

Yes things are looking a bit different here at Small Dog Blog Headquarters. I wish I could say in was in connection with something significant or noteworthy, but the truth is that I took a blog and website customizing class last week and I’m just goofing around learning new tricks. You know how I adore tinkering with things. I’m toying with the idea of a professional website here in the new future; the valiant Val, husband to Venice, was kind enough to walk me through the website process a week back, and I’ve been scheming about it ever since. And what better way to practice than hazarding the blog with near oblivion as I press buttons and fiddle around. Who knows, the blog may change again here in the near future! Likewise I might delete the internet, anything is possible.

tech

Humor, Life

Brief Dispatches From the Front [Desk]

“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?”
– Albert Einstein

Last week was hard, kittens. Sleep deprived, having to cover for coworkers out of the office, training replacement, too many projects, borderline cold that never materialized hard. I was not sorry to limp out of the office Friday. Luckily I had brunch on Saturday with Jane and a phone call with Peregrine to set me up cheerful again and I took Sunday off to just relax – something, it turns out I’m really bad at doing. Comically bad.

20 days left at the PD. Four weeks from today is my last.

My trainee is flying my desk so I’ve taken up residence in a corner of the front counter with my laptop (lugged from home every morning) and tea. It’s uncomfortable and requires a bit of contortion, but I’m pretty chipper (see again: 20 days).

We’re starting to gear up for selling our possessions right from underneath ourselves. Local minions, or those who know anyone looking locally, in need of some household goods/furniture, let me know.

Family portraits this week for J.’s side. Which is substantially larger than mine and looks to be a major production! All of his siblings and their children will be in town, which will be fun since his whole clan doesn’t get together too often.

Things I shall not miss about the PD – being told to take lunch breaks and to not worry about assisting patrons when I’m clocked out (even if no one else is available), only to be reprimanded for not being available to assist a patron because I’d clocked out for a lunch break. Le sigh.

The babies on either side of us are still wailing nightly. Reasons to look forward to moving out.

stress
This may or may not be factual.

 

Humor, Linkstorm, Weekend

Friday Links LX

There is little chance that meteorologists can solve the mysteries of weather until they gain an understanding of the mutual attraction of rain and weekends.  ~Arnot Sheppard

Hey, minions.  I’m seriously exhausted after this week, and a car just drove off a road into a house on the edge of campus so it’s going to be a hectic day.  Here are your links, tell me what you’re doing this weekend, and excuse me I’m pretty busy!

This is awesome.

Present shock – a fascinating idea, and an excellent interview on the subject.  Does anyone suffer from it?

Ever feel link you haven’t accomplished anything with your life? Me too. Here’s some salt for us collectively. (Editor’s note: this kid is seriously cool.)

Food for thought.

My love for historically based photo projects should be well documented at this point. Let’s add another to the gallery!

I predict this child will have a thriving career in espionage.

Boy golly…and just what have I done with my life…?

Five months, five months, five months… (Sidenote, how great are these?!)

Ha!  No.

(Warning, profanity discussed). Some of these need to come back.  I think I’ll need to add “Snails!” to my repertoire of in-case-I-stub-my-toe-near-impressionable-children alternatives.

Perspective.

Wow!

Alas that my summer roadtrip was cancelled, but yours doesn’t have to be, ducklings! 

Best movie breakup lines.

Humor

A Matter of Days

“The older generation thought nothing of getting up at five every morning – and the younger generation doesn’t think much of it either.”
~John J. Welsh

It’s been three days since J. started his job and I started showing up at work in 6:30am.  Three dark, long days.

I am not built for early mornings. It is a source of great hilarity to my mother that to this day that when I first lurch downstairs for sustenance during visits, I communicate mostly through snarls and slanted one eyed glares. J. finds my morning crawl towards consciousness equally amusing.  He’ll stir the pot with questions like, “Do you love me yet?” and when I growl, “No,” he howls with laughter and steers me towards the kitchen.  I have a somewhat fuzzy but still correct memory of grunting, “I. Hate. Happiness.” on one particularl holiday morning.  The plain and simple truth is that I’m subhuman before 8am and even then things can be iffy until 9.

On the other hand – I’ve only got twenty-four days at the PD.  Not that I’m counting.

I'm seriously considering it.
I’m seriously considering it.
Humor, Office, Work

Wild Woman (Kind of.)

If you have a job without any aggravations, you don’t have a job.
~Malcolm S. Forbes

Uh oh.  My time at the PD is winding down and my inhibitions are loosening their grip on me.  Either that or the early hours are already affecting me…

A patron came in to contest a ticket, and I went out of my way to try and help him craft an appeal, at his request.  I even directed him towards some student groups that are working to change the policy if he wanted to voice his views more broadly.  While answering his questions as best I could this 18 year old kid seemed to decide to make me the focal point of his frustrations.  He gave me a lecture on the subject of university policy, call me dumb, and interrupted and snapped at me several times.  Even the front desk officer was taken aback by this young man.  I really hate patrons like this, but I kept it together.  Until…

He asked what tone he should strike in his appeal, and I recommended, “Well, I understand you’re angry but I wouldn’t be argumentative with the appeals officer about the policy, just lay out your facts as to why this ticket is undeserved.   ”
“Of course I’m not going to talk to him the way I’m talking to you,” he said and rolled his eyes with a terrific sound of disgust.  That brief hacking sort of noise teenagers make when you do something “lame.”

My eyebrow shot up.  “Then why are you talking to me this way?  Why is it appropriate for you to be rude to me, especially since I’ve been trying to help you get out of paying a ticket, but not him?  Frankly I don’t appreciate that. ”
His eyes stretched and he sort of mumbled something before he grabbed the map of campus (I’d provided) and marched off without another word.  The desk officer gave me a discreet thumbs up.

I’m not proud, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get a brief rush of satisfaction!  I may turn over a bale of paper next, or run barefoot through the office.  The Revolution has arrived!  But you know, a sensible sort of one.  Properly managed and not too violent, we don’t want to make a fuss.

Humor, Husband, Work

Bright Eyed and Bushy Tailed…

“Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man wealthy but socially dead.”
– Animaniacs

Yes, but... (via)
Yes, but… (via)

I scribble this to you, kittens, bleary and cranky from my desk at work.  I’ve been here since 6:30am.

After months of applications, a few interviews, unreturned phone calls, and more applications, J. and I figured that there was no work to be had for him around here – not too shocking a revelation, but still pretty unwelcome.  We’d decided to head out to the East Coast to spend some quality time with my family, who we don’t get to see often enough, and do whatever odd work we could find out there.  Last week we started making concrete plans.

Which is, of course, when J. got a last minute interview and a job offer.

I could just pout.  Not because I’m not thrilled and grateful he found summer work, I am!  But because this has more or less been the pattern of our lives for the past year – we make a plan, it’s a good plan, we start working towards that plan, and fwoop!  The rug is tugged out from underneath us.  We’re pros at righting ourselves when our balance is tampered with, but still.  I’ll be spending some time out there by myself, and we’ll spend a couple of weeks there together on our way to London, but I was really looking forward to my summer in the woods.  Ah well, I’ve already started coming up with some schemes to make up for it.

The only bad part about this job of his is that it starts at 7am, which means I must be deposited at my office with enough time for J. to get to work.  He gets the car because his shift ends in the early afternoon and I’ll still have hours of work left.  My last month at the PD will have some long hours (and we all know that a morning person, I am not!).  On the other hand, I now have another previously untapped hour in which to work on projects.  That’s pretty great, to be honest.

It’s just already been a long day, and my trainee is struggling.  But it’s Monday so I feel both she and I are entitled.

Humor, Linkstorm, Weekend

Friday Links LIX

“Nature has no mercy at all. Nature says I’m going to snow.  If you have on a bikini and no snowshoes, that’s tough.  I am going to snow anyway.”
– Maya Angelou

Last time this week is was 70 degrees, bright and clear.  Glancing outside my office window right now it’s snowing.  Blech.

As always, TGIF!  I’ve been doing some intensive training for my replacement this week, which has been rough, but on the other hand J. and I went to a lovely dinner party on Tuesday, we have friends coming over tomorrow evening, and I’m making progress on several of my innumerable projects.  Random Spring snowstorms notwithstanding, the winter blahs are behind me I think, and things are looking brighter and brighter.  Here are your links, minions, and let me know what you’re up to this weekend:

I may dislike cooking intensely, but I can also make you a magnificent roasted tomato soup from scratch.  Chalk another one up to Mum for insisting I avoid this fate.

Lord Byron might have bee “mad, bad, and dangerous to know,” but his physician is something more of a sad, ridiculous character.

Make the call, genius or a bit too much?

Seriously?  Locally there’s a somewhat unfortunate tendency to treat proposals as if you’re asking someone to prom.  J. was the subject of some scolding from female friends when of our proposal they demanded, “How did you do it?!” and his response was, “I asked her and she said yes.” I have no complaints, note.

The cost of libraries.  Worth it.

Fear that your social media presence will die with you?  Fear no more, there’s an app for that.

Alas, poor Easter Egg Roll!  Fun fact, I participated as a young child when my father was working in DC and still have a wooden egg signed by the then president squirreled away somewhere.

Cool!

I first learned about Mike the Headless Chicken in a Psychology class in high school.  To this day I remained fascinated, and vaguely appalled.

Good advice.

As if watching Mad Men, excellent as it is, doesn’t make you glad enough these days are behind us, here’s what the folks of Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce might have thrown together for a successful campaign.  Yikes.

Jeans and t-shirts, apparently, no one could have predicted!