“The sun did not shine. It was too wet to play. So we sat in the house. All that cold, cold, wet day.”
― The Cat in the Hat
London is freezing, guys. I cancelled gym classes and stayed bundled in at least three layers of clothing for most of yesterday, feeling precisely no shame about any of my life choices. It was not a day to go outside!
January was a rough month, and that was before the polar vortex hit. I’m not sorry it’s behind us! After another doozy of a week, I’m spending the weekend preparing for a work trip and buying a hoover to finish cleaning up from the repair works to our apartment. This project ended up being much more of an ordeal than I could have ever anticipated when the whole mess started back in August. It’s put me off home ownership for a long while to come–never have I been as delighted to not have enough net worth for this amount of property damage to be my permanent problem! Living on the floor of our living room for weeks while the repairs have gone on has been awkward and and stressful and I’m not sorry to have the (literal) mess behind us.
A question I have long pondered!
Here is a 100% delightful profile and feed to brighten your day.
In case you missed the horrible and horribly important story in The Atlantic about the accusations against Ryan Singer…well, it’s hard to read, but important in the midst of the many (long overdue) conversations we are having as a society.
Relevant to my random, weird interests!
What did the President know and when did he know it, etc. etc. At this point, the “best” explanation for Mr. Trump regarding all his many minions having contact with inappropriate foreign agents, is that he’s such a bad boss and poor manager that he was totally ignorant of large amount of illegality within his personal and political organizations. And of course, this is not actually a very good legal defense at all!
GOOD.
This thread went viral and it is worth every single second of your scroll time.
What a fascinating piece on a topic that is probably beyond the majority of western society.
This Kickstarter project has a backstory!
Ugh, do not want.
Overwhelmed by stuff? Overwhelmed by the Konmari decluttering of stuff? Some help!
Oh this is a deeply necessary read in our household. I shed like a sheepdog!
In unsurprising news, a disinformation attempt.
Give this person all the awards.
Has anyone else seen The Favourite? I watched it last week and loved it, the performances are absolutely brilliant. Anyway, a relevant piece on Queen Anne and the fact of a royal body, a royal woman’s body, and the body of a woman deemed to be unattractive or unacceptable.
This piece on the importance of self-compassion has really resonated with me. I’ve become increasingly aware over the last couple of years of how brutal I often am to myself. If anyone talked to one of my friends the way I talk to and think about my own person, I’d light them on fire and dance on the ashes–and yet I really struggle with the notion of being kind or gentle to my own body or brain.
Small Dog Syndrome 
“Self-compassion is a way of reparenting yourself,” said Neff. “If you grew up with really critical parents, it’s a chance to treat yourself like an unconditionally loving, supportive parent.”
THIS. So so true.
I also liked the comment about how those traumatized in earlier life have a hard time being nice to themselves because we’re not used to kindness! I am still (at a much older age than you) gobsmacked and grateful when people are kind to me and, especially, forgive me for screwing up. I will say, finally, I am a lot nicer to myself than I was for a long long time. Cutting toxic people out of my life (like my mother) helped a lot. It’s very tough if the people who are SUPPOSED to love you do not — you think “right, well I must be terrible because…” instead of realizing they are the ones screwed up.
LOVED The Favourite and need to go see it again. I want a T-shirt that says “I am capable of much unpleasantness.”
It’s so true. The piece made me think about how much I mistrust acts of kindness (unless they come from an almost literal handful of people) because I don’t see it as “normal.” I’m really making an effort to try and cultivate more kindness in my own life, but I significantly underestimated how much of this requires that I start by being kind to myself.
SUCH a brilliant movie.
I think it’s great that you see it, and are making a start on it. We all develop coping and defense mechanisms for reasons — and it can take a long time (I know) to go,ohhhhh, I don’t need that shield anymore. I can put it down now and be/feel safe.
But that act alone can feel scary.
My diagnosis has forced me to put my needs first. That’s new and challenging in itself.