The Precise Science of Naps

“Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.”
~Redd Foxx

I’ve been fighting something for about a week now.  I can’t tell what disease it is exactly because it simply will not come to the foreground.  It’s lurking in the lymph nodes of my mouth and manifesting itself as nothing so much as exhaustion and a mild sore throat that just won’t go away.  But yesterday I felt so beat and icky that I went home early and tried to get some rest.

Getting rest for me is no easy feat because I can rarely sleep during the day, I usually have to be on death’s door to get some shut eye.   But, after much trial and experiment, I’ve discovered the magical combination that puts me to sleep.  And it’s more than a little bit ridiculous.

First of all I have to be on the couch under our large window.  Secondly I have to be, cat-like, in a sunbeam (which is odd because normally I can only sleep in pitch darkness).  Thirdly I have to be listening to Planet Earth, or Blue Planet…or basically anything narrated by David Attenborough – something about his voice just soothes me into slumber.  Finally, I have to be reclining on a very specific pillow at an even more specific angle.  But by these powers combined, I am Captain Zonk-out!

Unfortunately…yesterday I couldn’t quite get the clouds and the pillow quite right and spent about an hour and a half fruitlessly trying to fall asleep before throwing off the blanket and looking for something to do instead.  So I popped a couple of aspirin and reorganized our closet looking for things to throw away or donate.  Then I sorted through the (very few) books we’re not keeping and bagged them for library donation.

Every weekend I seem to be useless, but let me tell you, sick and drugged up I can get everything on my To Do list done!

2 thoughts on “The Precise Science of Naps”

  1. Planet Earth always puts me to sleep, especially when my hubby and I watch it right before bedtime. Hope you feel better soon!

  2. I am a Wacko Napper, too! I have to perform this elaborate ritual just to catch a few minutes of sleep during the day. Hope you get to feeling better soon, or at the very least find the perfect sun beam to nap in 🙂

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