Redding, ‘Rightin, ‘Rethmetic

“My spelling is Wobbly. It’s good spelling but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places.”
– A. A. Milne

Pumpkins, you know I try to blend the everyday with humor, toss in a pinch of cynicism, and baste it lovingly with hyperbole before serving it up to you, piping hot…but there are some things that cannot be sugar coated.  I hate to break it to you if you didn’t already suspect it, or alternatively confirm your worst fears if you did: the kids are not alright.

"May I have the word again, please?" "Your word is 'cat.'"

At least, their spelling isn’t.    I’m again convinced that autocorrect is killing our brains. Here’s a few of our most recent puzzles (from witness statements, appeals, emails, and letters) and our best guesses as to what they are supposed to mean:

hared = hard
vary = very
ad = and
mastak = mistake
whey = why
exspesholy/espetially = especially
roung = wrong
lugudge = luggage
situadion = situation
oll = all
agaon = again

7 thoughts on “Redding, ‘Rightin, ‘Rethmetic”

  1. I’m going to make a point to learn sign language. I’m pretty sure proper English is on its way out! My favorite is a FB status update I read today: “I’m taken care of muhself. God is muh judge.” Taken= taking Muh= my grandmother’s nickname and, apparently, the new form of My.

    1. In the future the global will be a language of html code, chinese, ebonics, spanish, and phonetically spelled Queens English (see your FB reference). Prepare yourself!

  2. My personal favorite, from the children’s home where I worked: “Hambogo”, meaning “hamburger”. Factor in a Caribbean accent and it’s quite an accurate phonetic spelling–and excusable, since the writer was 6 years old. Not so excusable: my boss writing “surpenered” in an official report. Given context, I’m fairly certain she meant “subpoenaed”, though who knows?

  3. The trouble comes when the minions writing the autocorrect software begin to misremember how things are supposed to be spelled. The correctness of America’s written English is going to rest on their shoulders!

    You’d have thought a college education would do _something_ for these people…

  4. You should see what my students come up with! I despair of ever being able to convince them that learning how to spell properly is a path to learning, understanding, and using one’s own language…and that being able to do so will be to their advantage someday.

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