“Whoever one is, and wherever one is, one is always in the wrong if one is rude. ”
~ Maurice Baring
Dear World at Large,
Me again! You know, if you could just learn one or two of these little lessons I’m trying to get across, we wouldn’t have to speak so often. You could go along your merry way and I could kick back and return to chuckling benignly at your expense. But alas, you seem determined to thrust yourself rudely at me, and here we are.
This one will be pretty short:
It is an almost laughable fallacy of yours that customer service will get better as you get nastier. Snarling (literally) at us, calling us foul names, rolling your eyes and making “under your breath” commentary about the person trying to help you (heavy on the word “incompetence”) might be a nice, passive aggressive way for you to make your feelings known, but it will not speed us up. It will not imbue us with bureaucratic powers we do not currently posses and it will not endear you to us. Screaming at us will actually make us less inclined to work with you, as we will be primarily concerned with getting you out of our hair.
And, here’s a tip, if you are determined to be a b***** or a b******, being surprised when someone responds to you in kind doesn’t become you. Because someday, some brave soul not confined to office-job-obligated politeness will let you have it. And you will find it a harrowing experience.
Just a heads up,
C.
Small Dog Syndrome 
AMEN! I always wonder what the foul-mouthed complainers hope to gain by being ugly.
Me too! Who decided we live, as my friend Margot calls it, a *itchocracy? And that the more evil you are, the more successful you will be with people? It’s baffling!
Although I have found when dealing with the cell phone or credit card company, the firmer you are, the faster you actually DO get to the person with power…
Firm, professional, and clear on what you want/need, yes. Screaming expletives before you have even told us what the problem is, no.
The military does offer some choice opportunities to teach such people a swift, forceful, and not easily forgotten lesson in etiquette. I miss that, ahem, influence.