Tag: Snark

Brr! And Grr!

“Son of a…”
-Detective M. looking out the window

In December - charming.  In April - evil.
In December - charming. In April - evil.

Ok, Mother Nature, you obviously didn’t get the message earlier, either that or you’re just a sadistic psycho wench, so I’m going to make this as clear as I can.

KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE SNOW.  IT IS FREAKING MID-APRIL.  There should be blue skies with plenty of clouds, flowers shooting up left and right, and cheerful springtime animals starting to frolic about.  What twisted alternate time warp are you in?  Have you no sympathy for people’s feelings, let alone the calendar?  I am getting sick of packing up winter sweaters only to drag them out of the closet for 48 hours at a time.  Is there someone else up there we can talk to, because you clearly aren’t managing to get your job done.  To summarize, showers are permissible, blizzards are not.  Fix it.  Now.

Battle of the Sexes, Part I

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other.  Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
-Katherine Hepburn

frustrated20womanIt has been one of those weeks that makes a girl grind her teeth in sheer, agonizing irritation.  Even though most of it has been completely uneventful, wednesdayand thursday were well and truly mind blowing, at least philosophically.  First of all we had a guy come in to report that he was being sexually harassed: about a month ago he had written a letter to the editor of the paper of the university (which is a religiously funded one with a rather conservative mindset.  Which is the understatment of the century…) about people’s various choices in fashion choice, most particularly women, and how immodestly dressed women deserved to be subjected to catcalls, name calling, and other behavior until they “put some clothes on.”  For reasons this knight errant, obsessed with protecting the virtue and chastity of women (what century is this guy living in?), could not fathom some women found this suggested behavior offensive.  Go figure.  And in the spirit of the modern age, these ladies (grand total: 2) created a Facebook group against him, which was the basis for his harassment claim. 

It took about three times longer than it should have to explain to him that while this group could be classified as libel (it was removed from the site, by the way) it did not actually constitute sexual harassment.  While the actions he was advocating, on the other hand, most definitely would fall under that category.
“I didn’t mean it seriously,” this guy huffed.
“Well, sir, the truth is that sarcasm doesn’t translate.  You aren’t responsible for the tone you intended, you are responsible for the words you wrote as they appear.”
“You agree with those girls, huh?” he asked belligerently.
Yes, thought C. nastily.  “Not necessarily,” she said politely, “I’m just pointing out that the only actions that could be construed as sexual harassment in the case are technically coming from you.”
He slouched off muttering under his breath about ten minutes later.  Clearly this guy is one of those poisonous types who think that all women should be dressing like his mother.

To be continued…